imaginarycircus

Google is hilarious.

My father's visit today however was not. He did not call when he was close by as he had said he would, he showed up and we were around the corner, which is where I told him we would be. He left us some stuff on our kitchen table and then called me. We ran home and got there just before he left. He talked to us for two, maybe three minutes outside on the street and then left. He spent a whole day in CT with my brother, but I get a drive by on his way home to Virginia. He and my step-mom are coming up for my graduation and are going to have lunch with us and then leave. What the fuck? Am I chopped liver? I know I AM the step-child, but damn. I'm sort of pissed off, and sort of hurt.

Then we watched the video of our wedding, which we hadn't seen until now. I was a fucking spaz during the entire ceremony. Nodding and laughing and bouncing. I look like I had St. Vitus dance, or you know, ants in my dress. I was so freaked out after wacthing that, emotional. I made tea and watched Sweet and Lowdown because someone rec'd it to me. I've been meaning to watch it for years, but since it has a character who doesn't talk--it was helpful. But I noticed Playland in the background. I grew up across the street from it and every time I see it in the back ground of a movie I get that pulled up feeling like when you think there is another step on the stairs and there isn't and you stumble although you are standing on the floor. Or maybe that just happens to me?

My dad (stepdad) bought me the Tiffany money clip my mother gave my father when they got married. I have no idea what to do with a sterling silver money clip. Any suggestions? I also have a dozen lead crystal high ball glasses engraved with my dead father's initials.