imaginarycircus

We're in Maine for a long weekend and I just want to hide. I am hiding right now. Part of me wishes I'd stayed home and quiet all weekend and part of me is glad I came and did this even though it was hard. I know David is glad I came with him even though it's been a struggle.

I had a weird minor panic attack yesterday while driving to Bar Harbor. No idea why it happened, but I was reading in the car at the time so I stopped. I took deep breaths and closed my eyes and just calmed down. I felt weird and queasy for a while after and very light headed, but I managed.

I see my psychiatrist tomorrow, but I am not hopeful that we'll come up with a good interim solution. I just. :/ I have to get through the end of the month. They've asked me to come in sort of at the last minute and cook for a retreat without David there. The logistics are wonky and I'm nervous about it. We'll see.