What part of no, was unclear? [imaginarycircus]

David and had a quick dinner out after my class. We were both mentally out of it and exhausted, but we had a nice time making faces at each other in lieu of intelligent conversation. Then we ran into CVS to buy David a new pair of shoe laces. Poor guy was so tired he was confused about there being two laces in a package that contains a pair of laces. He picked up two packages, meaning four laces of course. When I was trying to point this out to him, gently, we were in line. There was a lady with a two or three year old and a stroller. The infant was out of the stroller and was clutching some candy. The mother said, "No. Put that back please." And the child said "NO!" Now I have spent enough time with small children to know that this is normal. She told the child again to put the candy back. The child said NO again and sat in his stroller. The lady then said, "I don't think you'll like that candy." Even I could see that was weak. The kid knew he'd won.

I went to put the extra laces back and when I returned to the front of the store the lady was unwrapping the candy and giving a piece to the kid. Way to be a doormat lady. Now, I know that I shouldn't judge her. Who knoes what is going on or if this was an aberration for some reason. And I don't have a kid. Maybe if you are exhausted and it is 7:30 pm it is easier to give your defiant kidlet a tiny piece of candy and get out of the store without a huge fight... But I still felt in my gut that she might be raising her kid to be an entitled brat who walks all over her. I really, really hope not.

Also, The animal welfare ads are killing me. They make me choke up and cry. I swear if I ever have money I will donate to the ASPCA or my local shelter or something. :( Stop showing me little puppies with scars and eyes missing. Cats that are all ratty and miserable looking. I just can't take it.

Bertie has rubbed his ear so much he has a big scab. EEEK. I think he might have allergies. Poor little dude.

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Those commercials make me cry too! And the Purina ones with David Duchovny doing the voiceover. I mean, how can *anyone* resist his voice + pictures of puppies?

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The Purina one! I have to change the channel or turn off the TV. The ASPCA one with Sarah McLachlan makes me cry harder though.

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No, it's not easier. Trust me. Ugh.

I very carefully NEVER bought Gillian candy at the grocery store. ONE TIME, she asked her father very politely, and he bought some.

It took me six months to get her to stop WHINING for some every. single. trip. Ugh.

That was pretty much what I thought was the case with kids. And I really think this woman just had no spine. But who knows maybe she is having some crisis and has to pick her battles. I'm trying hard to give her the benefit of the doubt, when occam's razor says, "doormat."

If she had been at the hospital for hours with her mother/spouse/sibling/friend and there is death/disease/mental breakdown involved... Well, in those circumstances I would probably hand the kid candy too. The lady did look very tired.

but yeah...

But I still felt in my gut that she might be raising her kid to be an entitled brat who walks all over her.

No, that pretty much seems like what was going on. Lady, you're bigger and older and stronger and smarter. You don't have to talk your toddler into doing anything; if he refuses, you make him. A no should mean no. It's doing the kid (and society at large, because one day other people will have to deal with the kid too) a disservice in the long run to back down like that. No means no. And I get that it can be exhausting to deal with a tantrumy kid who's screaming for candy, but that's what you're in for when you decide to have a baby. Knowing that, at least once and probably more times than that, they will freak out in public and you'll have to deal with it.

Yeah. I almost felt like holding out my hand and saying, "Kid, your mom said no." I'm not sure why a few tears is worse than raising an entitled brat.

Ugh. Yeah, you definitely don't do that. All parents have low moments, and I personally think most parents have secretly bribed their kids a few times. Sometimes it's all about just getting through the minute, with kids. But even when you bribe your kids you don't just roll over like that. Also, note how the child doesn't even start out by requesting the candy, or by taking the candy and showing it to his mom--the child just automatically takes it and sits in his stroller despite the "no." He knows from the beginning that Mommy isn't in charge. That parent's problems are only going to increase as the kid gets older.

That is what it looked like. Though she sounded pretty firm when she was saying, no.

I saw your post about a wedding yesterday. I didn't even know you were engaged. I have not been keeping up with livejournal. Congratulations!

I can tell you what our decision making process re: the wedding was like, if you want. We had a similar situation with money and what to do with it.

arggggh, see, this is why i can't get the kids i nanny to do ANYTHING, because of parenting like that. the boy hates school, and the dad used to just let him skip (a 6 year old!) so now he thinks if he drags his feet enough i won't make him go. what happens instead is that he's late for kindergarten and has to go in his pajama top, and that's AFTER 45 minutes of my mentally wresting with him to get ready and get in the car. people seem so afraid to do anything that might possibly upset their kids. dammit, you're the parent, so act like one! if your kids know you are the authority and they can't get away with being brats, they won't try shit like that with the candy bar. :(
but again, i do not have my own children, i just take care of them for other people.

aww, i'm glad i don't watch tv, that would be too sad! poor lil animals. i want to adopt a dog, but the ones that fit our criteria are always already taken by the time we call about them.

OMG, that is so horrible about the kid. i don't think I could do that job.

what kind of puppy are you looking for?

yeah, he's a good kid most of the time, but they both have some serious issues with discipline and doing things they don't want to do. and sharing. :\

we want a little poodle mix, preferably a cockapoo (the boy grew up with them), but we've inquired about several different types of little mutts (we just need to make sure whatever one we get won't hunt the bunnies, thus the poodle mix), and they are always adopted before we get to them. it's a good thing, i suppose, but it's still hard for us. we don't have any rescue groups or anything in the area (just the county shelter) and groups in other areas often don't want to adopt to someone more than an hour away, so we're kind of screwed for the most part. it's not very fair for us, but i totally understand the reasoning behind it. we just want to find the right little dog, and i don't want to have to buy one from a breeder, i want my money to go towards an agency that helps homeless dogs. :\

So I feel really dumb for not knowing, but are you babysitting as your sole gig, or are you still doing sciency stuff? Why do I not know this? *feels super dumb*

Oh, that sucks about the puppies. Maybe you could form a realtionship with one of the rescue agencies and once they know you they will adopt to you even if you are a little outside their area? Cockapoos are cute. Puggles are evev cuter! :D But they might chase bunnies. I sone day want a newfie.

heh, my interpretive (sciency) gig is seasonal, so i've been nannying the kids the past few weeks. my job will start up again mid-may at the latest.

i'm applying for this guy right now! http://search.petfinder.com/petnote/displaypet.cgi?petid=8191917
it'd be a bit of a drive to get him, but if they'll let us, we certainly would make the trip!

Duh! I knew that! I just forgot. *facepalm*
OMG CUTE! DEAD FROM CUTE! I made a squee noise and Bertie was all "Wot? I am washing! Must you interrupt with annoying noises, pink monkey."

i know, he's so fluffy! we're sending in our application, though i don't know if we have much of a chance anymore. :\

hahahaha, your cat communicates hilarious things which make me laugh! it's such a cat thing to say though, and i like that they think of us as big pink monkeys.

mycathatesyou.com captions most of the cats as saying "pink monkey" and I just stole it from him. :D

i will hope the puppy comes to you. HOPES (I typed hoes first. No. No hoeing...)

imaginarycircus

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